So Many Ways to Help

Yes, today's post is ultimately about boot camp; but I want to start with something more important.

I make a lot of jokes here about pain, sobbing, misery, and how hard this is. But in reality I am a very fortunate person who is in a safe place, with a dry home, and not under immediate threat of a nuclear power plant meltdown. The people of Japan can't say that right now. The situation far east of us is very serious, and there are many very real people in very real danger. I know that times are difficult for many of us financially right now, but if you can, please make a donation to the Red Cross or Doctors Without Borders, or another reputible charity that is working to help.

One of the easiest ways to donate is to text the word REDCROSS to 90999, and your $10 donation will just show up on your cell phone bill, which probably has so many mystery charges on it every month anyway that you won't even notice.

Okay, now back to boot camp.

Today we had new recruits, which is awesome and exciting! I love our team and I love seeing familiar faces every day, but I also really love seeing the team grow. This has been one of the best things I've ever done for myself; I want to see it be one of the best things lots of other people do for themselves, too!

Talking to today's first-timers, I heard many of the same fears and concerns I had. These other people look so in shape...can I do this? How sore am I going to be? Is Sgt. Ken going to be really mean?

The class vetrans were awesome about gathering around the newbies and reassuring them, motivating them, and sharing their enthusiasm about the class. I think they were relaxed and ready to go when the clock struck 5:30...

...and it ran through my head, Oh, God, somebody needs to WARN THEM!!

We started our warm-up, which is a workout in itself. I recognized the look in the eyes of the new recruits behind me. This is a warm-up??

As I walked back to get a drink of water, I assured them that every single person in the class had that exact thought on their first day. And pretty much every day after that, too.

Today's workout was fast and exhausting. It was one of those that gave me that false sense of relief as we changed exercises, only to have that relief dashed when my brain caught up with my body and realized that the next exercise was going to be just as painful...

We all made it through. Missi, one of our newbies, asked me at the end, "Did you do as badly on your first day as I did today?"

First of all, I want to say to Missi and both of our other first-timers, do not sell yourself short for what you did today. You all did awesome. This is hard; it is supposed to be hard. It is designed to push you further than you think you can go, and as you get stronger, you will be able to do more and more every time. You were rockstars today, and don't you forget that.

Second, hell yes, I did as badly on my first day as you. Worse, in fact. I know how you felt today. I was very weak, very out of shape, and not prepared for this at all. No one's first day has ever been as ugly as mine. But I did the only thing that would fix that: I came back.

And today, I am rocking a brand new pair of size 12 jeans. That's down a size from when I started. And they fit great.

Non-boot camp related: I got to play music yesterday with my friend Arwen. We have a couple of gigs coming up in the next few months so we got together to read through some stuff. It was my first time playing with a harp player, and it was so much fun!

Too Sore for a Clever Title

Yesterday's PT was super rough on the upper body, particularly the chest, triceps, and abs. So, naturally, today we got an upper body break.

BWWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAOHMYGOSHICOULDNOTKEEPASTRAIGHTFACEHAAAHAHAAAHAAAA...*snort*

No. Today we did Accumulators again. Very upper-body heavy on the first half (which is deceptive, because the "first half" is repeated way, way more than the "second half"). It was damn near impossible. I made it through, with many rest breaks during the mountain-climbers. Other than those, though, I did every repetition of every exercise (with the exception of the UFCs, because my knees will not cooperate with those; I substituted resistance-band squats). In spite of my soreness and fatigue, I felt really strong and really good today. Sure, I was plotting my revenge against Amber throughout the entire workout; but that was just to keep my mind off the pain. Honest.

Seriously, though, here is why START Fitness works for me and other things like P90X, 30 Day Shred, and working the machines/freeweights at the gym don't. Let's take P90X as an example. That's a darn tough workout; the instructor uses the same methods and concepts as Sgt. Ken (muscle failure, working multiple muscle groups at once, super-sets, etc.). If done properly, one can get into incredible shape with that program. Why won't it work for me? Because when I get tired during a P90X workout, I stop. I have no motivation to push past my perceived limits; but every single time we have done Accumulators in boot camp, about half way through the first round, I have thought "I'm not going to be able to finish this - there is no way." And if I were at home doing the workout on my own, I wouldn't finish. I'd quit, and think "I'll do more of it next time." Then eventually, there isn't a next time and the DVDs are sitting on my entertainment center collecting dust.

But in boot camp, I'm motivated by the energy, encouragement, inspiration, and peer-pressure of the class and the instructors. That pushes me to keep going. Yes, I have to rest sometimes, but I always push through a few extra reps, or a few extra seconds, before I do. Because I want to really, really do the best my body will do. And I feel like everyone else in there wants me to as well. It is exactly what I need.

Subject change.

I had a very yummy breakfast this morning and I wanted to share. I'm calling it "Bananas Foster Oatmeal."

1 serving old-fashioned oats
Pinch salt
1 packet Splenda
1/2 banana, diced
1 Tbsp. International Delights Caramel Macchiato creamer (yes, it adds 40 empty calories; It is worth it)

Make the oatmeal according to directions, and mix everything in. It is super delish, and oatmeal and banana is a great post-workout breakfast.

One final note: I will not be at boot camp in the morning. I have to take my daughter to a doctor appointment, and I won't be able to get my 8 hours in at the office unless I get there early. Amber and Sgt. Ken, if you'll assign me a workout that I can do at the gym, I promise I will do it either tomorrow after her appointment, or Friday if it's too late tomorrow.

Non-boot camp readers: Today's Groupon is a crazy awesome deal for START Fitness. Go get it now and join me in my awesomeness.

What are you doing still reading this? GO NOW!!

PT!

Today we had a surprise PT (Physical Testing). I loved PT when I took karate years ago; it's rewarding to see quantifiable improvement.

Today's PT consisted of push-ups (as many as you can in 2 minutes), crunches (as many as you can in 2 minutes), and a one mile run. I was looking forward to it.

Then Sgt. Ken explained the push-up rules. Military style. From your toes. Drop to your knees, and you are DQ'd.

And with those words, all of the confidence and pride I've been building up over the last three weeks was gone. That frightened, weak little fat girl immediately took over my head, and I was terrified. I couldn't do a single push-up from my toes; I just knew it. I had tried before, and I've never been able to lift myself at all.

So as I sat there, on my knees, waiting for Sgt. Ken to give the ready command, I choked back tears (y'all are really getting tired of what a crybaby I am, aren't you?), and told myself that I just had to do what I could; my best was all I had to offer. My teammates obviously saw my terror (I'm imagining that my face was pasty white with red-rimmed, bloodshot eyes ready to go at any second), and they encouraged and reassured me that I was going to do fine. I felt like I was kneeling there waiting for a baseball bat to the back of the head. Sgt. Ken must have seen how afraid I was as well, because he came over and reassured me that I didn't have to do very many to pass. Still, I was sure it was more than none.

Time to go. I got into position, lowered my arms to 90°, and to my astonishment, pushed myself up. I did one.

Then I did another. And another...and another. Twenty-three in all. That might have been the lowest number in the class (I don't know), but it was enough for me to pass that portion of the test. And it was 23 more than I thought I could do.

Next were crunches. There's no real story there; I passed with them, but I didn't do as many as I'd like (109). I'm going to really try to focus on my ab work and improve that number next time.

Then we did a one mile run. My normal running pace is a 10:00 to 11:00 mile. I've never really tried to push myself any faster than that. Well, today we were expected to push ourselves, so I did. I told myself it's just a mile; I can walk it in at the end if I have to. So I ran beyond my comfort zone. I had to walk twice, but then I got right back into my pace. It was a tough mile. I finished in 8:32. That's the fastest mile I have ever done.

The entire class nailed it. Everyone in the class is amazing, from the most elite of the athletes to the greenest beginner. We all have heart, determination, and drive. It is an INCREDIBLE team and I am proud to be a part of it.

When Failure is a Good Thing

Muscle failure, that is.

That was pretty much today's theme. Just work a muscle group until it just doesn't work anymore. Then move to another, and repeat. It was brutal. Sgt. Ken was back from his vacation, and he wanted to make sure he was just as tough as Amber had been while he was gone.

I figured out today that regular strenuous exercise doesn't actually make you live longer; it just makes it seem like you do.

I can just see me in my sixties, getting up at 4:30 to go to boot camp, thinking "Christ, this is miserable. Why can't I just DIE already? I need the rest..."

Then I'll think, "No, I don't want to die just yet; that muddy buddy race is next weekend and I think I can take my age group no sweat. Probably the next age group down, too..."

I cried during about 30% of the class this morning. Partly out of frustration (my dive-bomber push-ups don't even remotely resemble dive-bomber push-ups), but mostly it's just a weird physical reaction my body has to intense strain. It happened to me when I ran the Country Music Half Marathon, too. I don't know whether people can see that I'm crying or if it just all blends in with the pain-contorted, sweat-dripping faces of the rest of the class. I've ceased to be terribly concerned about it, except that I don't want newbies seeing me break down and be frightened off. I need a tee-shirt that says, "The tears don't matter; the results DO." I might have to make myself that shirt this weekend...

Three Weeks

Today concluded my third week of boot camp. I am amazed that I have been able to do this. I'm not only sticking with it, I feel like I'm really putting in the effort, really getting the most out of it. Yes, there are still things that I have to modify or do with less-than-perfect form. Yes, I still have to take a breather several times during the hour. But I know that I'm stronger; that I've improved; that I'm going to continue to improve.

This is an amazing program. You don't have to be an elite athlete to do it; but if you are an elite athlete, you can still get a workout that will push you to your limits. Really, that is the only requirement for this program to work for you. You have to be willing to let it push you to your limits.

My official weekly weigh-in this morning was 184. I've lost six pounds in three weeks. I've also started to see a reshaping of my body. Pants are fitting me better. I'm beginning to take more pride in what I eat (I passed up cake today at work). I'm feeling very good all around.

We did circuits today in class. Circuits are always a bitch; but the way Amber had them structured today could make Superman go cry to his mama. The stations that were super-energy draining and aerobic were together, and then the stations that set your legs on fire were together. So basically they were super-sets (maybe not by the strict definition, I don't know; but that's what they seemed like to me). I had to go outside three times because I was sure I was going to be sick or start sobbing. All I can say is that I'd better look pretty fucking awesome in that Wonder Woman costume in September.

The highlight of the workout was that I had awesome teammates, and when I said that we had to make sure to be the most absurd group at the Sumo Squats station (yelling "One, Two, Three, SUMO!!), they all heartily agreed. And if I must say so myself, we were pretty awesome Sumo Squatters.

I was by far the least fit of my team; but that was okay. They were super encouraging and I'm finally starting to let go of the embarassment of being so fat and such a beginner. It's a difficult thing to get over; I've always been a bit too proud and self-conscious for my own good. I tend to gravitate away from things that are challenging for me and instead stick with things that I have a natural knack for. I'm an artsy person. I'm a musician and a writer; and I do both of those things sitting down (or standing still, at the most vigorous). I don't have a natural knack for anything athletic. So boot camp is definitely out of my comfort zone. But I'm pushing past that, and it's very rewarding so far.

I know I'm behind on my daily reasons. I'll write a daily-reasons-catch-up-post this weekend. Right now I'm going to bed, and enjoying the fact that I can sleep until 5:00 in the morning.

Here's a clip from today's workout. I'm at the far end of the Sumo line.

Accumulate This...

Accumulator workout again today. I'm not sure whether it was harder than the one last week, but it sure seemed to be at the time. There were so many times in the workout where I thought I'm not going to be able to finish. I'm going to have to quit. I'm actually going to have to quit. At one point, I really thought I was going to pass out. Not a joke; it was that demanding on my body. I had to stand for a second and make sure I had my balance before going to the next thing.

I was frighteningly close to having my mind made up that I was going to skip tomorrow. I had myself convinced that my body needed a break; that I wasn't strong enough; that missing one day wouldn't hurt...

Then I got home, and a couple of things changed my mind. First, I stepped on the scale. 186. I've lost two pounds this week. I weighed twice just to be sure. That was a nice thing to see after such hard work.

Now, I know that sometimes scale-hops can be deceiving; maybe I was dehydrated. Maybe tomorrow at my official weigh-in for the week I'll be at 187, or even back to 188. Weight fluctuates and you have to pay attention to the trend, not the daily numbers.

But the second thing that happened can't be taken away from me.

I have a pair of black jeans that I have to wear a loose shirt with, because the waist is tight and I get a muffin-top with them. This morning, I put those jeans on.

No muffin top.

That's right; I officially see a change in my body. My black jeans fit me better now. It's a small step; those jeans are still three sizes bigger than I want to be wearing. But it is a visible, notable change. And boy, did it feel good. It felt really, really good.

So this made me think of other improvements I can see in myself. My running has improved; my push-ups have improved; I don't get winded going up and down stairs anymore; and, as I mentioned before, my blood pressure is back down to the low side of normal.

So, unless I wake up tomorrow morning with a fever or my eyes swollen shut or missing a limb, I'll be at boot camp in the morning.

It's worth it.

Why I Love Boot Camp

Actual quotes from this morning's workout. I'm leaving names out.

"I feel like if I move, I'll poop my pants."

"I think she's just trying to make the blog."

"You should write, 'And then this one girl pooped her pants, and then yelled HOOAH!!'."

I love this group of people so much.

Today was running (so yeah, profanity ahead). It was around 35°F, so that was perfect for me. I was in a tee shirt and my compression tights. Jimmy was concerned that I would be cold. I told him that I turn into a furnace when I run. By the time we were out of the parking lot, I was wishing that I had worn something lighter. I could honestly heat a moderate sized home with what radiates from my body when I run.

So, remember that hill that made me think Shit? We ran that again today. Three fucking times. I didn't puke this time, I only retched a little. But for the love of all that is good and pure, that hill is the suck.

By the time we got to the field I was feeling better; it's generally flat and downhill from the top of hell to the field (which, of course, means that the run back is generally flat and uphill). The drills on the field were good; the sprints with squats at the end of each leg were tough, but I felt pretty strong right up to the end. The ladder drills (also known as suicides; not because they kill you, but because they make you long for the sweet release of death) turned my legs into lead. No, not lead; plutonium (it's heavier, for my non-geek friends). I honestly wasn't sure whether I was going to be able to get back to the studio. Of course, Amber knows what she's doing and I was able to make it back just fine.

As usual, I went through the whole spectrum of emotions regarding boot camp. From hating it when my alarm went off (I was dreaming about shopping, people; you just don't interrupt that), to being glad I was doing it during warm-up, to wishing I could just melt into the pavement and disappear forever during the hill, to feeling like I could conquer the world when I was through. Fortunately, the emotion that sticks is that last one.

Here's a clip of the dreaded Accumulator day. I'm the fat one. But not for long. :)